Last night I found myself watching nightline, actually its something I watch every night, damn I miss Ted Koppel… any who last nights show caught every bit of my attention…  Cynthia McFadden was the reporter, and also is adopted… pretty much it revolved around a woman who had a sickly son, her son had a rare from of cancer… her son is now in remission, but the doctors suggested researching her bloodline… in an effort to save her son, she started her mission… she hired a woman who’s also adopted who has perfected the art of finding the natural parents of adopted children…

After a lil internet searching, the woman was able to find the agency that her client was placed in…  the client (the adopted woman) goes in, and gets some basic information… her mom was young, a teacher, and she had had an affair with a young man and ended up pregnant…  because this all took place forty years ago, the woman felt she had no choice but to give the child up for adoption…  she was also catholic, so having a child out of wedlock was a big no-no, till this day it’s a no-no, but back then, you were sure to become an automatic outcast…     so, the woman obains preliminary info from the agency and immediately shares the info with the woman she hired to assist her in her search…  the woman immediately goes to the internet and finds the mom…

She’s a retired teacher, appears to be stable… now, the woman from the agency suggested that she write a letter, where are the woman she hired to help her suggested calling her…  I’m not sure how I feel about calling… If I were fortunate enough to locate my natural mother, I would most likely write a letter… 

After several hours of coaching, the adopted woman calls her natural mom, and although you couldn’t hear the conversation, you could tell that the woman was NOT happy about her calling, and interrupting her life… all you could hear was her repeated apologies… she told her natural mom that she loved her, and she also thanked her for giving her up for adoption as he has had a happy life and had some awesome parents…  I guess the woman responded, and she told her that she was stable and she was not looking to cause her harm, she then went into the situation with her son, and began to inquire about the family medical history, and she ended the call by thanking her and giving the natural mother her phone number…

The call ends, and then Cynthia McFadden began to ask questions about the call…  the woman stated that the natural mom was 70 years old, and she had grown children, and she also told her hat no one knew, not her husband, not her kids, NO ONE…   and that was the end of that…

The segment ended with Cynthia McFadden following up with her 8 months later… and she had NOT heard form her birth mother… man, I lost it!  I cried, and cried, and cried some more… then I called my mom and she cried… it was an emotional moment for Ms Teal…    my mom has ALWAYS been supportive of my finding my borht parents, my dad on the other hand was oppsed to it…  the interesting thing is that he could have made one call, and the search coulda ended, but it never happened…  I guess he had his reasons… 

There was a time that I actively searched for my birth mom, thousands of dollars later nothing…  it was always an off and on kind of search…  the thing that would always get me would be those damn Sally Jesse Raphael reunion shows, and also Oprah’s reunion shows..  They always put me in search mode… 

Last night’s nightline confirmed my biggest fear…  WHAT IF THEY DON’T WANT TO KNOW ME?  Another damn rejection…  it’s interesting as much as I’d like to see who I look like, and how many siblings I may have, and If I have a big family I’m always concerned about the rejection…

The story ended with the pending laws that are being passed in various states, with Maine being the first…  sometime in the near future, the state of Maine will begin opening adoption records…  something as simple as a written letter will put folks such as myself that much closer to their birth parents…   WOW!  

As much as it excites me, it still scares me…   I can only hope that I will be afforded the opporuntity to place my eyes on my birth mother before I die… 

What do you think?  Do you think that adopted children should be able to see adoption records?  Do you think it’s fair for the birth parent to suddenly open the door, and the kid they gave away some 40 odd years ago is there waiting to receive them with open arms?  Or do you think the kids should just get over it and accept the fact they will forever be left with a void, a feeling of NOT belonging? 

This is some deep stuff! Some of you will not understand what the big deal is, because you aren’t adopted and you know your natural parents… but then there are those few who will truly understand where I’m coming from, because you are adopted, and you know how it feels to live life feeling like something’s missing… 

For me, it’s a matter of having a connection, knowing who I look like, and most importantly knowing where I come from… hell, I want to know where this 38dd’s come from!  lol   

note: it was my intention to post this only on VV, but I decided to also post it here...  for whatever reason, I felt the need to share that! 

I’m far from a lurker but on VV I lurk…  and the more lurking I do, the more I take in, the more I learn…  and ladies let me tell ya, a sista has learned a lot… 

I am definitely bi…  but, the more I learn about the ladies of VV the more I realize that there are obvious levels of bisexuality…  now, don’t ask me what the levels are, cuz I’m still trynna figure that out!  Lol, but this much I know for sure:

I love women…

I love watching them in and out the bedroom…

I enjoy kissing women…

I enjoy touching women…

I enjoy playing in pussy with my fingers…

And I absolutely ADORE breast… 

I like them ALL sizes… From DDD’s too  plump B’s…

But…

I really don’t know how I feel about eating pussy…

I enjoy playin in it…

And I do enjoy eating it…

But,  eating pussy is not something I enjoy doing the most, nor is it something I must do…  now, don’t get me wrong, cuz every so often I run into someone, where I can get my eat on, and I enjoy what I’m doing…  but, if there’s no TRUE connection, I often times feel like it’s a chore…  I’m basically reciprocating in kind… But, let me run into my ideal woman, with a mind, body, and soul I adore… And it’s ON…

Now, with all that said…

What I enjoy the most about women, are the ones who enjoy eating me…

The ones who get off on getting me off...

The ones who wanna feast in my pussy, and play with my tits…

I’m far from a selfish lover and will always give what I get…

But what I truly desire is passion with a woman… 

True animalistic passionate sex!

I’ve had it once, and one of these days I hope to have it again…

BTW, Thanks “J” I’ve never had an experience like the one we had 2 summers ago…  

So, with that said… as I continue to learn, and I continue to explore, and I continue to lurk…  I will soon find that perfect woman, with the perfect mind, a gentle soul,  with that perfect pussy that makes me melt at the sight of it, smile at the smell of it,  that perfect woman that’ll have me savoring  every moment as I eat it…

The joys of life no black, no white, just mad shades of grey…

*smooches*

Ps., if you’re a Bi-Sista (or even Bi-Curious)  lookin for an online home, then check out Vice~Versa, help us, help Storm (the owner of VV)  reach her goal of 300 hundred members strong by October!  

http://viceversa.ning.com/ Click the link, and explore a whole new world!

1. Do you like blue cheese? Yup, especially in Ledo’s Steak n’ Blue Cheese Salad…. YUMMO!

2. Have you ever smoked heroin? Not that I know of!  NO silly…

3. Do you own a gun? Nope, not unless you consider my vibrator a GUN...

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic? Man, u want some Sonic!  Brings back memories of those hot summers in Oklahoma…  Cherry Lime Aid’s are the BOMB!

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Only the OB/GYN… not knowing your family medical history will do that to a sista…

6. What do you think of hot dogs? Great on the grill, and not so bad on my George Foreman…

7. Favorite Christmas movie?  Anything none Christmassy…

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? A good cup of coffee, and a glass of ice water…

9. Can you do push ups? Can i?  and a split!  lol

11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? My tiffany necklace that my daddy gave me, that I rarely take off… makes me feel like he’s with me!

12. Favorite hobby? Masturbating….  

14. Do you have A.D.D? On Monday, Wednesdays, and Sundays!

15. What's one trait you hate about yourself? That I won’t take life changing risks…

16. Middle name? Ellen… shut up!

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? Money, Sleep, and MORE Money…

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday? A painting to match my NEW stools…   A Ledo’s Deluxe with Bacon, and Gas for the gas guzzler…

19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? Water, Coke, and Passion Tea Lemonade w/ 12 pumps!

20. Current worry? Replenishing the 401k, which I butchered in order to survive last year…

21. Current hate right now? My growing condo fees…

22. Favorite place to be? Ocean City

23. How did you bring in the New Year? With my baby!  It was actually the best New Years ever… he said:  “Happy Birthday Mommy”!   

24. Where would you like to go? A trip to the Caymans or Barbados would be nice…

25. Name four people who will complete this? Friends, foes, associates, and wannabe lovers…

26. Do you own slippers? Yup!  Do I wear them? No!

27. What shirt are you wearing? An Ed Hardy wife beater…

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? So 70’s!  hot ass tacky ass shit…  give me some high thread count, and I’m happy…  THAT’S LUXURY…

29. Can you whistle? Nope! 

30. Favorite color? Orange is my signature color, and Chocolate brown is the favorite…

31. Would you be a pirate? Nope…

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I’m too busy trynna figure out my damn life while I’m in the shower!

33. Favorite girl's name? Darcy, Dakota, and Dallas…

34. Favorite boy's name? Malcolm

35. What's in your pocket right now? My Lord n’ Taylor ID

36. Last thing that made you laugh? A customer at Lord n’ Taylor, ragging on how awful she looked in the dress she was trying on!  Better her than me, right?

37. What kind of sheets did you have on your bed as a child? Not sure, but knowing my momma, they were NICE!  She NEVER slacked on bed linens… actually she never slacked, or slacks on ANYTHING!

38. Your worst injury you've ever had? My damn bone spurred big toe!  Thank God for anti-inflammatory’s!

39. Do you love where you live? I loved it when I first got it, it was my own lil museum, but 8 years and 1 kid later, I’m not feelin it…  but, it’s MINE, the LTV is extra LOW, and I’m in MAJOR redecorating mode…  it’s on the path to architectural design!  Lol, at least in MY head… 

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 6, two are BROKE!  I got some Sanford n Son shit goin on in the bedroom (thanks Witchy Poo!)  soon to change!

41. Who is your loudest friend? Lol…  Witchy Poo…  oh and Syl when her ass is DRUNK!

42. How many dogs do you have? MANY!  Oh, we’re talking pets, NOT men…  oops!  NONE…

43. Does someone have a crush on you? I dunno know!  A few have expressed interest in A Love, but few have expressed interest in TEAL…

46. What is your favorite candy? Mr. Goodbar

47. Favorite Sports Team? Team Tittie!  Monique and Unique…

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? I’m goin down!  Lol, I really haven’t thought about it…  

4. What were you doing at 12 a.m? I was WIDE awake… NOT GOOD! 

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?  Another day, that I’m closer to meeting my summer financial goals!  Yo, a bitch is GRINDING and on a FUCKIN mission…  I got folks in shock ova me and this part-time gig…  Thank You Jesus, I FINALLY woke up, and realized that money is not ALWAYS meant to be SPENT…  lol

Nighty~Night!

Greetings my good people of Multiply and 360!  I wanna throw a true story out to the masses and in turn get some open and honest feedback…

We have a couple who has lots of history…  they were college sweethearts, who eventually moved on and married others…  one marriage ends in divorce(her), and the other is in the midst of a long term separation(him) where divorce it imminent… 

Chance brings them back together… and I say “chance” because they are both from the Great State of Texas, and due to work, and family they both ended up on the East Coast in the same TRI-State area…   YEARS have gone by, and the male calls the female to simply wish her a Happy Mother’s day, only to find out that they are living in the SAME area… an instant re-connection is made, and a new chapter begins…

During the process of picking up where they left off, they are introduced to swinging… boundaries have been set, and everyone is respectful of each others limitations… they attend an area club on a semi regular basis, and have attended a few private lifestyle parties…

The couple experiences the normal growing pains that relationships go thru… and as with all relationships, they learn from the issues and continue to grow…

Everything is flowing for a good 18 to 24 months…  suddenly the female gets a call from another female…  dude lies his way thru this distraction, and states that ole girl is out of the picture, and has been out of the picture for some time…  but knowing women the way that I know women…  Most women will not call the other woman unless they are at their wits end, and need to know where the situation is heading… dude pretty much; sweeps the situation under the rug, and all is well, after the outsider has verbally agreed to NOT contact the girlfriend or him again… 

They survive this major relationship violation, and continue growing, learning, loving and swinging….  Months go by, and a reliable 3rd party gets word that the male half of the duo was in attendance at a local party WITHOUT his significant otha… instead, he’s at the party with another woman…  

Dude is confronted with all the evidence…  you see dudes other female friend, has a page on a local swing groups site…  this is an invite only site, that the girlfriend has managed to become a member of…  the main pic on the site, has dude and the chick all bunned up, appearing as a couple…  the comments clearly state that dude and his otha girlfriend are regulars at this groups functions…    now, dude is sooo crafty that he has  convinced  his girlfriend that when they aren’t together, he is ‘studying’…  he’s studying alright: New Ass 101…  

Here’s the clincher…  dude and girlfriend had a planned weekend, one that involved a road trip…  but, dude swiftly invites girlfriend on a business trip, where they hang out, and do what couples do…  she comes home a few days earlier, goes back to work, and prepares for the upcoming weekend get-a-away…  Suddenly dude can’t go!  Ya know why?  He needs to STUDY!  Girlfriend goes on her planned weekend trip with friends, and low and behold, one week later girlfriend finds out that not only was he NOT studying, but he was at the lifestyle party with girlfriend number 2…   dude is confronted, and he doesn’t really deny the shit, but, he refuses to come clean AT ALL…  instead, he does this reverse psychology bullshit, and goed into some major deflecting…  and instead of coming cleaning, he decides the relationship is over, because she pretty much is taking other folks word over his…  but, lets keep in mind that girlfriend has in ya face proof, not to mention a reliable source…

This is the VERY short version to a VERY long story…  a story of  sex, love and swinging…  I gave you enough to hopefully inspire a comment…    

My questions are simple:

What provokes a man to cheat, when he’s in a swingers relationship? 

Is there no loyalty amongst swingers? 

Is it hard to be straight with your significant other?   “Babe, I ran into the baddest sista that I’d love US to experience”

More importantly, when you've been busted, and ya shit is on the table...  why NOT fess up?  

The bottom-line, is this:  we all know that men and women cheat for various reasons, but in my opinion, cheating in a swingers relationship, is unacceptable!  If you’re offered the buffet, why creep with the appetizer?   when the main course can be shared...  (ok that was silly, but you get the point)...

my thoughts ar simple:  RESPECT!  dude didn't respect my friend nor the relationhsip enough to be upfront with her, or with himself - when the respect is NOT there, and the TRUST has been destroyed, what's left?

First and foremost my ass has been horny as hell…  FOI (the Muslim Ex) came in town, and we spent Wednesday and Thursday evening at The Ritz doing what we do… talking shit, eaten good ass food, and drink some good ass liquor!  The deal with FOI is that he’s a big buff, beautiful dude, with the body of a Greek God, and I get off on just being around him!  Not to mention he has a mean ass tongue, and a mighty dick…  lol  FOI and I have known each other for over 15 years, we were a couple for about 3 of those years, and he was really “my one”, but like a lot of men, he really didn’t know how to deal with his feelings for me, and the relationship slowly died when he admitted that he loved me…  and as with most of my ex boyfriends we maintained a close relationship…  although he moved back home to Houston, whenever he’s in town which is several times a year, we hook up…  now, before I hook up with him, I always have to inquire about the “type” of visit…  you see FOI has always told me that I “suck the life out of him”, and most of our visits consist of us talking shit with the band members (he’s head of security for Frankie B and Maze), and drinking…   but this time was different, when he called to tell me he was in town, and he wanted to spend some time with me, I asked him: what kind of visit will this be?  See, I need to know what mindset should I be in prior to getting there… if I know out the gate we ain’t fuckin then I’m good...  but if I get to him, and I’m horny and all he wants to do is snuggle, my ass is pissed… this time, he didn’t respond… he simply told me to: get my ass to Georgetown… and I told him: I’m on my way…  So, we meet, we greet, I hang out with the crew and we then check out the new tour bus, which was the bomb, and I attempted to break it in, but someone beat us to it, and was in the mix as we walked in (damn groupies)… we take it to the room, and dude gave up the goodies, and I once again SUCKED THE LIFE OUT OF HIM….  Maybe I FUCKED the life outta him, either way, nukka was humming when it was ova!  Lol

Now, that was both Wednesday and Thursday evening… the problem with good dick, is you want better dick…  I woke up on the fourth hungry for some dick, but I really didn’t want to be bothered…  So, I got pleasure from my toys and went on about my plans for the 4^th…  the whole time I’m chilling I’m thinking about how got damn wet my pussy was….  And that was the beginning of my “mission possible”! 

Saturday I was supposed to start training at the new gig…  I get there and the trainer has called in sick… due to the fact that my ass had a major hangover (thanks K, and Sisters!)  I was happy to carry my happy black ass home…  but I still had one big problem, I was still HORNY…  see the issue with getting good dick is you want more, all the damn time…  so I had an itch that needed to be scratched, BAD!  But first, I needed to sleep off my hangover, and get some much needed rest…

I woke up around 3, and I immediately starting calling folks… mainly dudes I have yet to fuck, but wanna fuck, but never got around to fucking… see, I’m a freak, but I’m a selective, conservative moody ass freak… my true freakdom doesn’t start to flourish until John leaves for the summer, and John “officially”  left this morning and the freak officially woke up after my mid afternoon nap…  lol

So I’m making calls and no one answers… after while folks start calling me back, they are no where in the area, there at the beach, or at family reunions, all types of shit… basically unavailable… one dude was so happy I finally called he offered to cut his beach weekend short by two days just to serve a sista up lovely…  I told him to chill, and enjoy, and I would catch him in the weeks to come…   now, I’ve exhausted all my resources, and I’m still HORNY! 

And somehow, some way, I ended up on Fling.Com.  Now, I’ve been on fling for a minute… it’s a cool sex sight, that I visit for a good laugh…  I’ve met a few dudes on fling, mainly for drinks, and a lil explicit conversation, but no sex… yesterday it was about the sex…  I logged on and just waited… within 15mins, I had well over 40 messages, and I began to weed thru them, tossing out the bad apples…  I narrowed it down to 4 prospects, which soon became 2…  one dude I was kind of interested in, but he was young (26), and young dudes don’t know how to savor good pussy, they wanna run up in it, and then repeat the process 10 mins later..  Which is fine on occasion, but I wanted a good session… after listening to the youngin go on and on about his tool, I decided he was NOT the one… so, I focus on prospect number 2, we’ll call him “O” aka Mr. Fatty…

So, “O”, and I had some really good conversation via chat, we didn’t once talk about sex, and I liked that…  the quickest way to get my attention via the net is to NOT go into sex on the initial conversation…  we chatted, and then we spoke over the phone…  I told him that I was trynna get out the house and he said he wanted to cuddle, and taste me…  so we arrange to meet…  he gets a room, and some drinky~drinky, and I agree to meet him there…

I get to the spot, and we greeted with a hug, and then we sat and talked and drank for several hours… we decided we were hungry, and he ordered a pizza, as he ordered the pizza the FUN began…  I’m lying across the bed, and dude starts straight eating my ass out… man it was good!  He was fucking the hell outta my ass with his tongue, I’m steady gyrating, and he begins to finger fuck my ass all the while talking to the domino pizza man!  It was nice nasty clean innocent fun…  after he gets off the phone, he flips me ova and starts to straight fuck my ass hole with his tongue, thrusting it in and out, all the while finger fuckin my pussy… 

Suddenly, he’s like; let’s make a video…  hmmmm, now that sounds like a plan!  I haven’t made a video in some time, and although I don’t know this dude from Adams house cat, I decided to go for it, plus I know how to position myself, so that my face isn’t showing…  he hooks up the laptop, brings it closer, to the bed, and I start suckin the hell outta his dick….  Oh my goodness y’all his dick wasn’t the longest dick, but oh my goodness that joint was FAT TA DEATH!  Man I started, suckin, and spitting, and slapping my face with a that fat piece of meat, and my ass was in heaven…   he then throws me across the bed, and begins to eat this pussy real good… dude starting humming, and shit, had the clit vibrating, and outta nowhere, a bitch was straight nuttin, all ova the place… and then came the knock at the door!  This dude had a great personality… he jumps up, off the pussy and yells, PIZZA MAN… throws on his boxer briefs, and gets the pizza… 

We pause for the pizza eating cause, and take a moment to enjoy our movie!  Man, I gotta tell ya, we made one helluva video… lawd help me!  So, we finish eating, and dude proceeded to eat my pussy…   he ate for what seemed like hours, constantly telling me how good I taste, how wet I am, and how good it smells…  dude was eating the pussy, like he was a freed hostage!   And I loved every minute of it… but dammit, I wanted that fat dick!  So I bust one off, and suck his dick, until he bust one off, he nuts on the girls, and I give him a few moments to gather him self…  just enough time to get the juices flowing in Mr. Fatty…

We both take a cat nap, and next thing I know dude is eating me from behind, and I’m wide awake…   I toot my ass up, and raises up, and dude slid Mr. Fatty in Ms Wet~Wet, and Ms Wet~Wet was WET!  Whew damn was she wet…  now Ms Wet~Wet loves getting it from the back, doggy style…  you see, Ms Wet~Wet likes to buck when she fucks, and lawd help me, what she do that for?  Lawd y’all, I did that, and dude was GONE…  I started fucking that dick, and dude started slapping that ass real HARD, I took a hand and started tweaking these nipples, and before you know it, Mr. Fatty, and Ms Wet~Wet, were throbbing and cumming at the same damn time!  I hadn’t experienced a nut in unison in some time…  

A great night was had by all, and I must say my ass musta been mad fuckin horny, cuz mami don’t cum for everyone…  

So here I sit on a Sunday afternoon, pussy throbbing as I write this, thinking about, how I can get more dick, in Ms Wet~Wet…  and until I figure that out, I’ll play in it!  Lol

Hope you guys had a great Holiday Weekend…  I must say my weekend was great, I spent time with good friends, saw my daughter and grandson, and took great pleasure in creating my own fireworks, and at this point, I’m trynna figure out how I can create a few more!

Have a great week, babies…

When you do smell and you’re at work, what do you do? Do you wash up? Do you conceal with a tampon or do you return to your seat hoping and praying no one else can smell your stank pus?  Lol

Would you agree that there are levels of coochie funk?  Like moderately funky, and highly funky? 

I guess y’all are wondering where all this is coming from, huh?  Well, lemme tell ya!  I tend to enjoy smelling myself…  last night I got home and I  grab some sweats off the floor, and when I sat down, the aroma hit me…  and I said: you stink!   (Writing this at work and chuckling like crazy) and then I got a good whiff and I said:  but it’s that good stink!   (If there is such a thing… with me, there is)… the good stink made me horny as hell!  Any who, I got to thinking about stinky pus and how some women have NO clue…

I’m getting fat!   And the fatter I get the more I sweat under my tits… now that can stink! I need help, cause this is a NEW issue for me… now the interesting thing is this, it only stinks when I have on flavored soufflé, and that’s ALL I wear… guess I need to STOP lathering the milk cartons with body soufflé huh? Being obese sucks! 

I hate when I go to the nail salon and the Korean woman wants to rush me so she can make more money!  I try to tell her ALL the time, the more you rush me, the less your tip will be (keep in mind most of the hood girls are NOT tipping)… now for the umpteenth time, this bitch rushed me, and you can’t rush gel nails, the shit gets all wrinkled… but, cause her silly lil ass rushed me, I now get to go back tonight, for a repolish, and she gets to miss out on more money!  HA!

Can you tell the difference between: Japanese, Chinese, Korean, and Vietnamese upon first sight?  I can.  It’s something my mother taught me!  It’s all in the eyes and the shape of the their face… and yes they all slant, but it’s the depth of the slant… 

I often think I’ve been Bi all my life…  I was one of those lil kids that got caught exploring with otha lil girls… now; the interesting thing is I was always the one whose parents were called…  WTF? 

Although I’m Bi, I don’t know if I enjoy eating pussy as much as my bi friends do…  I mean I enjoy it, but I don’t love it!  I think, once again “I think”, I’m one of those women that like to be taken advantage of by other women, where I lay there and they do all types of  nasty, painfully cruel things to my body  (is there something wrong with me?) I said “I think”, cuase I have yet to experience that, and have nothing to base the desire on other than my twisted thoughts!  Now, I love women, I LOVE THEM, but I enjoy exploring them more than anything…  I like playing in pussy with my fingers, and I enjoy kissing and sticking my finger in their asses (only if my nails aren’t too long), but, my absolute favorite it titties…  I love sucking, biting, and nibbling on nipples!   So, with all that said, does that mean I’m Semi-Bi?

I also like women who have fat clits!  Fat clits are easier to play with!   Lol…  I’m inexperienced… but fa real, when a girl has a lil bitty clit, I feel like my jaws are going to lock cause you got to put in so much got damn work, lookin for the damn clit!   Sometimes I just wanna ask a woman: I’m sorry and what size did you say your clit was?  

Have you ever paid attention to a woman’s pussy lips?  Fa real, have you?  I swear some women have lips that hang very low!  There’s something both sexy and weird about that… this one chick tied her lips together, and all the while I was both intrigued, and disgusted… but I sure enjoyed playing with them!  

I’m still amazed at men who have “arm candy” but desire, “Thicky Ricardo’s”…  this takes me back to the other night at the pool party…  dude that I fucked had the baddest bitch in the house, she was FINE, at least to me, but dude couldn’t get enough of my big tittie ass  (matter of fact he’s hitting me up NOW)…  don’t get me wrong, I have high self esteem, and I loves me some Teal, even though she’s fat and is slowly squeezing into a size 16…  it simply amazes me that dudes marry Halle Barry,  and cheat with Monique…

I firmly believe that if SOME married women didn’t get so damn comfortable in married life, their straying ass husbands wouldn’t stray!  Granted some men are dogs that will cheat regardless how good shit is at home…  but trust and believe that the majority of the cheating men cheat, cuz wifey jus isn’t doin what she usta do!  I hear it time and time again…  I LOVE getting into the heads of married men… and because I listen to them, and remember every damn thing, you best believe I will be supa wife!  I will put my supa ho outfit on, fuck his brains out, stimulate his ass with some fucking stimulating conversation, all the while ordering dinner from Schwann’s and nursing babies….   LADIES, if you ain’t handlin ya business, trust and believe some other woman will!   For all my married friends, don’t start no shit with me…  this is the TRUTH!

My girl Dee ( I swear she would KILL me, if she knew how much her name came up in my blog this week… the devils blog!)  but,  her husband purchased a bike against her will, and without her knowledge (that in itself was an issue)  every since the weather turned, he has been wanting to take his wife riding…  all she does is bitch and moan about the damn bike, she looks at the bitch and sees: DOWN PAYMENT FOR A HOUSE…  to say she hates the bike is an understatement…  but peep this, the bike is NOT going anywhere, so let it go, Boo!  But more anything, if you don’t ride that damn bike, you best believe BoomSheeka from the hood will be more than happy to straddle that joint!  And then I told her ass: if you know like I know, you’d be bent ova that joint and letting him hit ya fat ass from the back!  She hates me…  but guess who was riding this weekend?  HA!  (don’t fuck with me!  I tell it like it IS…  sometimes!)

Did y’all know I was the keeper of Internet secrets!   It’s both a  privilege and an honor to know the secrets of so many of you…  to think that some people actually seek me out, wanting my advice on some things!   Lil ole me…   *smh* some of my real time friends would find that funny, the funny thing is that most of them don’t know me as well as y’all do!  *wink*  secrets are ALWAYS safe with me…  just had to say that, cause I really do feel honored…

I like to watch the exchange of words via the blog comments!  Some of y’all get emotionally involved in these comments…  some times, I just wanna get some kettle corn, read, and create a visual of how the war of words would go down in person…  hey, I’m all for being passionate about your views, but NOT at the expense of making people feel stupid, or ignorant, and even moré importantly making people feel like their view doesn’t matter,…  some of y’all are DEEP and jive HURTFUL!  But I love it…

I still want a 360/Multiply Wall, like on the L Word…  that way, we can see how many people are sexually connected!   Y’all some nasty fuckers…

Do y’all know that PECAN was in the DC Metro area this weekend, and he didn’t even  let me know!  Talking about he had no way to tell me…  now I know damn well that nukka got a Smart Phone, hell he’s a smart ass mutha fucka, so he gotta have a Smart Phone, plus he works in IT, dammit where there’s a will there’s a way!  Humph, I think he just flirts with me to build my self esteem…   damn him!   Any who, I hope the server crashes in Bethesda, and he has to come back on a weekend he has a lot of shit planned…  *stick tongue out*  and, I’m putting his ass on blast, I sent him my damn phone number, hell I can count on one hand how man men on the net have my number, so PECAN, you Pussy Eating Country Azz N****, next time you in the DMV, you best call a bitch, so she can straddle ya dick, OK?

In closing, I look forward to the day that the word whore is a respectable word… for I have whore’ish moments, and reflecting on those moments brings me great joy!

Also, as I read, and experience the worlds of some of my fellow bloggers, I must thank my parents for my upbringing and early childhood experiences! I swear, the best thing you can do to any child, man or woman, is expose them, to a world beyond television and home!

Now get outta here, go do some work!

*wink*

I’ve become obsessed with WeTV… obsessed!  A few shows that have caught my attention; Bridezilla’s has made for great Sunday house cleaning entertainment… and then there’s the series Women Behind Bars, for those of you who don’t know, I am also obsessed with Prison Documentaries, my dad did a brief stint as a prison doctor, and every since then (which was many years ago, I was probably 5 years old) I’ve been fixated on anything prison related…   I swear when Oz was discontinued I was devastated…

Here I go getting off topic AGAIN!

Any who, I happened upon another show that comes on WeTV on Tuesday evenings called: The Secret Lives of Women.  Now this is another GREAT show…   it pretty much tells the story of every day women, who have the picket fence, the dog, the home with the garage, and the 2 kids… but, most of these women have an interesting behind closed door life… some do it for pleasure, others do it to earn a dollar…  They have followed the lifestyles of a variety of women, women who like to take professional nude photos for their hubbys… women who strip on the side for extra cash, women who were once polygamist who have fled from the lifestyle and are now advocates for younger women who are forced into marriage due to their religious beliefs… it’s an interesting show, and even women who are dominatrixs, and or submissives, even prostitutes (by the way has anyone seen the new Call Girl show on Showtime?)   I’ve always and will always be fascinated with how people live their lives…  I find pleasure in knowing what brings a person TRUE joy…  so, I’m watching The Secret Lives of Women the other night, and low and behold the topic was women in the porn industry…  they showed how normal these women are, and how they live everyday lives…  the only difference was how they earned their paper…  instead of a 9 to 5, they work 5 to 9…  instead of sitting in an ergonomically correct chair, they sit on some woman’s or mans face…  but, WHAT no, let me rephrase that WHO caught my attention was, BUCK ANGEL…  have you all heard of Buck Angel?

Well, if you haven’t let me fill you in…  Buck Angel is the ONLY female to male transsexual porn star… (http://www.buckangel.com/) I mean he walks like a man, talks like a man, looks like man, but, he fucks like a woman…  you see Buck Angel still has a pussy ( I coulda wrote vagina, but pussy feels right!), and he has shaped and molded his career in porn based on being a man with a pussy…  man, this is so fuckin wild to me!  About a year ago, one of my fetish friends from 360 turned me on to ole Buck Angel, and I peeped him, her, hell I dunno! But I peeped him out, and was like: WOW!  I was speechless, and I’m still pretty much speechless…  so here I am a year later writing a blog about Buck muthafuckin Angel…  now, I’m a freak, and freaky kinky shit excites me, but in all honesty, I’m not sure what I feel about ole Buck…  I mean damn, I like pussy, but I like feminine pussy, hell, I love dick, and I like manly dick…  and hell, I’mma put my shit out there by saying that I could totally get with a sexy as feminine T-Girl…  in my lil crazy, sick way of thinking, a T-Girl is really the BEST of both worlds… 

 
But Buck Angel… what world is he in?  I know how he categorizes himself, and how the industry categorizes him but damn, I’m stumped on this…  I guess you could call him a T-boy? but damn if a man wants pussy he wants a woman,   if a woman wants a man she wants a man…  (given further thought, i must say there are those women who want a manly woman)...  off an on for the past few days, I've been wondering; who wants Buck Angel? The interesting thing is this; his following is all gay men!  Now, how bizarre is that?  A gay man, watching a female to male porn star with a pussy...  (dammit, i'm confused)

 
Now, I know this is some out there kinda shit…  but, y’all are some deep ass, wise ass folks, and some of y’all got this whole sex, gender, sexuality shit down to a science…  tell me your thoughts on Buck Angel?  But before you do, peep this out:

According to his website, Buck Angel was a pronounced tomboy as a child and adolescent. Unaware of the existence of sexual reassignment surgery, he lived for years as a female, dulling his sexual confusion with drugs and alcohol. Though he was profitably employed as a professional model, he has stated that he was generally dissatisfied with his identity and existence and "was not loving life." ^[1]

When he saw a film featuring a female-to-male transsexual character, he immediately began inquiring about sexual reassignment surgery and therapy and started receiving testosterone treatments. Within two years, he had his breasts surgically removed and began living full-time as a man. He has not undergone a phalloplasty and advertises himself as a "real man with a real pussy". It is not unusual for many FTM transgender men to forgo this procedure, as it is both expensive (usually about two or three times as expensive as the MTF genital surgeries) and highly risky; additionally, some transmen don't consider the results to be on-par with the MTF options. Angel is distinguished for his openness about possessing a vulva and the pride he takes in being a transman with female genitalia.

He is currently married to body piercer Elayne Angel.

A few months ago, a friend of mine contacted me about submitting a video for Big Brother... I’ve always said that I would do WELL on Big Brother... I’m pretty good at reading people and can pretty much size you up within an hour of being in your presence... Due to the current condition of my weight, and a few other things, I declined... Trust, I will regret the hell outta my decision come July when the show airs! My ass is basically giving away $500 grand! lol

This same friend submitted his tape and has since submitted tapes to other reality shows... The interesting thing is that this particular friend has mad skeletons in his closet, and goodness knows, he need not go on ANY show! By the time they dig in his past, he will BE the reality show...

So, as I sit here, listening to the rain, and praying to all things holy that the power does not go out, and I don’t miss Top Chef, I got one question for ya! Well, maybe two questions...

Would you consider being on a reality tv show? If so, which one...

Do you think your life is interesting enough to be the focus of a reality tv show?

What role would you play? Ladies, would you be the bitch, the girl next door, the whore, or the ghetto fabulous one? - Guys would you be the playa, the athlete, the all American boy, the manipulator, or the thugged rugged dude from the hood?

Lastly, if given the chance to be on a reality tv show would it be for the fame or the fortune? Basically would you enter a show that offer financial reward or 5 minutes of fame?

I’m bored... Talk to me peeps!

As for me, my life is really not that interesting, but I do have quite a few moments that are worthy of television, however my shit would have to air on HBO... If I was given the opportunity to participate on a show that had a ensemble cast I would be a combination of the bitch, the sweetheart, and the whore, but trust the whore would be behind closed doors, I’d be that bitch eaten coochie behind the camera in the broom closet! actually it would be on the down low (can’t give the lil ones class mates something to talk about!) lol and trust if I did go on a show it would not be for 5 minutes of fame it would be for the "small fortune"...

How about you?

 
I formulate a plan…

 
Once the plan has been formulated…

 
I work it… With much precision and GRACE! 

 
There are times when the plan does not come together…such as my being laid off last year, and not finding suitable employment until 13 months later… 

 
But, this plan… this plan right here, is on some extraordinary shit…

 
You see, this weekend is “BlackOut” night at “The Spot”…

 
And not just ANY “BlackOut” night, but the first one of the summer…

 
Can you imagine?  I mean really, can you fuckin imagine?  Freaks LOVE hot weather!

 
A few weeks ago I started to plant seeds to various folks… and some took the bait. While others did not, and that’s cool… 

 
But, I am here to tell ya, that this weekend at “The Spot” is gonna be OFF DA FUCKIN CHAIN…

 
I can feel it…   I can smell it, and by the way,  frisky ass Jackie is cutting up ova on 360…  *smh*   talking bout “she makes it rain”  ummmhmm, rain on me!  HA!

 
Bitches getting ready to be on some triple XXX – porn star – girls gone wild shit…

 
Did I  mention that it’s “BlackOut” night?  Did I ,mention that at midnight, all lights are turned da fuck off? Nothing but glow sticks to see our ways thru…  Did I mention that “ANYTHING” goes on the dance floor…    

 
Close your eyes, and imagine the dance floor of your favorite club with NO lights on, and a bunch of BARELY dressed, if not NAKED folks…   ummhmm,  that’s the scene, just NASTY… 

 
I’m here to tell you that on Saturday May 31, 2008 at the stroke of midnight, I will be on the dance floor at Tabu with a glow stick in my fuckin pussy!  And ya know what, I’m a selective bitch…  I don’t allow any ole’ dick up in this pussy…  but, you best believe, I’m getting ready to set it out…  family style, ALL U CAN EAT!  and if the dick is right...   ALL U CAN FUCK lol

 
I will re-earn my Ho card Saturday Night!  Yup, I said it, “HO’ Motha Fuckin Card”…

 
And Ms Jackie, you wanna get nasty in the “Dungeon Room”  bring it on Bitch, cuz I need it NASTY!  Not that over the counter VANILLA shit…  *smh*  that shit NO LONGER WORKS…

 
*wink*

 
And to Ms. Butterfly who use to be a fuckin Caterpillar (figure it out)…  you and your disappearing ass, I will hunt ya ass down, and tap on every fuckin door up in that joint, just to watch ya nastee ass in action, cuz I already know, that you and your boo, getting ready to CUT DA’ FUCK UP…

*smh*

Expect the unexpected, and the blog that is sure to follow… 

Ms Teal….  OUT!

We all fantasize... We fantasize when we walk thru Sak's shoe dept., we fantasize when we're flippin thru the latest issue of Vogue, we fantasize about fuckin the dude who works across the hall, and we fantasize about dude we wanna fuck, and we know we're gonna fuck, but have yet to fuck... Fantasies can go from one extreme to the other, from dream jobs to gang bangs, to girl on girl, to being dressed up as a school girl...

More and more my sexual fantasy is consuming my sexual reality... Not that anything's wrong with that, but if I ain’t fantasizing, I ain’t cummin. Simple as that! Often times I miss the days of having normal sex, with good dick and cumming from him just straight banging the pussy... But, the intensity of the nut combined with the fantasy compares to NOTHING I've ever experienced before, and lawd knows I've had some experiences. But lawd y'all, my fantasies scare the shit out of me! I know y’all get sick of hearing about me and my damn fantasies, but dammit, this is my blog, and i’mma speak on it...

Audience: so Teal, what's your fantasy?

Teal: do ya really wanna know? Well, I’ll tell you my fantasy if you promise to not change your opinion of me...

Audience: nothin you could say would change our impression of you...

Teal: you sure?

Audience: of course we're sure... *audience member raises her hand, and whispers in my ear: tell me your deepest darkest fantasy*

Teal: I can show u better than tell you...

Audience Member: then show me bitch!

Teal: you can't handle my brand of fantasy, cuz i can't handle my brand of fantasy ... you see my fantasies keep me up at night, and when my fantasy invades my reality, i act on it...  i do it my way...  i lay across my bed, and before you know it, i'm in my personal "FANTASY ISLAND".  I spread my legs, and i tease my clit, with each stroke to my clit the fantasy grows, as the fantasy grows the need for additional stimulation grows...  u see it's a process ... if i want to be taken, i tie my tits up, all the while imagining someone else tying up my tits ... if i want to be spanked, i turn into the school girl with the soft whiny voice, paint stick in hand.  Spanking dat ass, and often times spanking these tits too (dirty lil girl) ... when i want to be dominated i become the defiant lil bitch, talkin shit, pissin him off, makin him want to do bodily harm to me...  u see, i am the keeper of the fantasy, and until i find someone worthy of assisting me act out my fantasy, my fantasies are mine and mine alone...

However,  i will tell you this: there is nothing like fantasy baby!  it is the fantasy that keeps me fulfilled until that special one comes along ... in the meantime, i continue to fantasize about the day, my fantasy will become my reality...  i keep the fantasy alive and well in my thoughts, in my touch, and in my nut ... and with every stroke of my pussy, and every tug of my nipples, and every plug in my ass the fantasy grows stronger, stroke by stroke...

in closing, i will say this:  if you share your fantasy, I'll share mine...  *wink*

So I was sitting here bored to death perusing blogs, and blasts and my girl Christy Love from 360 (Christy Love, makes me think of a Pam Grier character) had a blast that went a lil something like this:

 
"He Came Home Drunk @ 2:30am & Said I Will Pay U If U Will Perform Oral Sex with Me"

 
Now, the blast actually came from an episode of Judge Alex, and once I saw that joint, I once again, got ta thinking!   Y’all know me, mind always in the damn gutter, and the warmer it gets the more scandalous my thoughts get…   I hibernate in the winter, and liberate in the summer!   And to think, pretty soon, I can start goin panty less!   Oooohweeee, I can’t wait…  leaving lil Teal drops all ova the place…   lol but, on the real I may need to rethink that panty less shit, It was cool riding in my car, but it’s another story on the TRAIN! 

 
Aight back to the business at hand…   so, when I saw the blog I was like damn, I’ve had a dude offer me money for sexual favors SEVERAL times, and it’s always the same damn guy…  this dude has a MONSTER ass dick, Incredible Hulk Monster dick…   he offered me at first $100.00 for Anal sex, he wanted to fuck me in the ass BAD…  and for the most part I’m cool with anal sex…  well, yes and no, it’s kinda up there with kissing, some moments must be saved for that special someone…   any who, dude begged and begged for months, and till this day, he will hit me with a “please, baby, please baby, please”  now this has gone on for years…  over the past year or so, the $100.00 has grown to $500.00, and I continue to say no…  hell, I know what size dick I can handle in my ass, and his dick surpasses a welcome challenge, it’s more like an unwelcome “painful” chore…    

When he first asked me, I was jive offended…  I mean what did he think I was, a hooker!   Lol, that was funny, cuz of course I had a brief career as an escort… but, for some reason I was offended by this… man I gave his ass the blues, and poor thing all he could say was, “I just want it sooooo bad” just because I’m offering to pay doesn’t meant that I don’t respect you, we’ve known each other for over 30 years”… so, he made a point, and I got over it…

 
Recently while going thru my personal economic depression he offered me $500.00 to get up in this ass, and I can’t lie, I thought long and hard, cuz for real, that loot woulda gotten 2 big ass monkeys off my damn back!   But I looked at his dick as I formed my lips in preparation of suckin the life outta his dick, and  said; OH HELL NO…

 
So, the question of the day is this:   would you be offended if a boyfriend or significant other offered loot for sexual favors?  And or offered loot for sexual favors that you aren’t at all interested in?   When so called “desperate times call for desperate measures”, would you consider taking your man or significant other up on his financially rewarding sexual offer?    My brotha’s have you ever offered wifey, boo-boo, significant other, friend or lover money for sexual favors she is NOT inclined to do?  

 
Now, I gotta tell ya, had I been facing foreclosure, and on the road to homelessness, I woulda sold my ass, my pussy, and my left nipple!   Survival of the fittest babies and you best believe a sista is FIT!  

 
Talk to me peeps…

 
One mo’ thing…



if by chance your man offers you money to do whatever the hell he wants to do, and you say “hell to da nawl”…  I highly suggest you rethink your answer, cuz the next step after offering loot, is finding someone who is willing to do it for FREE…  trust me on this…  (compromise is a word that can save a marriage especially if sex is the issue)